“The men and women ought to be ashamed of themselves who blame the woman for the wrong doing. Stupid comments like, “She should not have been there,” “She should not have been dressed up like that” are evil in nature.  She has a right to be wherever she wants to be, men just need to be men and not animals”, says the author.

The hallmark of a civilized society is where each one of us feels safe, secure and free. It is the responsibility of the majority or the ones in power to ensure that every vulnerable one is protected. A society where no one lives in apprehension brings prosperity, peace and joy to everyone. It would be a kingdom of heaven on earth!

Women and children are the most vulnerable beings in our society; they are living in constant fear of abuse and harassment, and one in three women is deeply affected by it. It is not easy to erase it from the memories, and the abuse keeps them tense for a life time.

As a man, shame on me if I remain silent when abusive men take advantage of women against their will, and I urge every man to speak up and stop the bad guys.

God has blessed women with built in antennas to sense the predator and they do everything right to avert it, but the abuser does not stop at it. We need to bring in severe punishments for the abusers if we want to be a civilized society.

Free will is the God given inalienable right of every human and violating other’s free will must be considered the greatest sin on the earth.  Here is a video about free will.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vQs1IcSdYA

Societies, political systems and religions have come into being to give safety to every human, and protect everyone from the predators. The men who wear religion on their sleeves and call themselves Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhist, Sikhs, Bahá’í, Atheists or whatever have an additional responsibility to prevent abusive men from such behavior.

You are familiar with these words, “I did try and fuck her.  She was married. I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there. And she was married. Then all of a sudden, I see her, she’s now got the big phony tits and everything. She’s totally changed her look. I’ve gotta use some Tic Tacs, just in case I start kissing her. You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful – I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything…. Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.”

Shame on all the Men who voted for the Chief Predator, and greater shame on creeps like Pastor Robert Jeffress of Dallas who brings fake approval from God for such behavior and shame on his congregation to keep him there.

The men and women ought to be ashamed of themselves who blame the woman for the wrong doing. Stupid comments like, “She should not have been there,” “She should not have been dressed up like that” are evil in nature.  She has a right to be wherever she wants to be, men just need to be men and not animals.

A civilized society is where a woman can walk freely without fear of anyone. Every woman should have the freedom to be who she is, what she eats, drinks, believes or wears.

A poem written by my friend from Dallas;

About that “Me Too”: Almost forgot 80s admin temp jobs, once getting pinned against the wall by a creep with a booby fixation. This poem was written years later in retrospect, directed at the “boys in the board room.” Not to make light of it, but humor has always been my way of coping:

“Deflecting Sexual Harassment with the Courage of our Conniptions:

A Defense Against ‘Perky Breast Syndrome'”

It has been years since I considered any of my parts to be “perky”

and a while since I cared whether they perk as long as they work

I suppose you thought you were paying me a compliment –Wrong!

and if you do it again I will sue the pants from you

So please remember:

When this company offered you a job with “perks”
they were not referring to me

and just be glad you have a job with perks;

I have a job with jerks!

— Linda Abramson Evans

I applaud all the women who withstood harassment and the beating they took to get the women’s suffrage movement achieves its goals.  Thanks to Anita Hill for being one of the first few high-profile women to bring the sexual harassment out in the public. Thanks to all the actresses who have ventured to reveal the harassment and humiliation they have endured from Harvey Weinstein and are speaking up.  Thanks to Gloria Steinem and countless other women who stood for the rights that women have reclaimed now.

Gone are those days, when a woman would not report sexual harassment to any one, it was an embarrassment and humiliating experience and the uncouth men and women blamed her, thus victimizing the victim further.

Here are a few suggestions to bring about the change:

A mother is more influential in a child’s life than anyone else. If she can raise her kids with values of gender pluralism, translated as, “No work at home is yours, your father’s, your brother’s, sisters’ or mine, it is our work, and all of us will contribute our time and effort towards getting it done.”  Thus, the newer generation can be raised as the kind of men and women we prefer to have in the society.   The family should inculcate such values.  We need another Gloria or Oprah among us to take this on.

Men need to give a full supporting hand in changing the narrative for our and generation and one immediately following us.  I was in India last month and took my two nieces to a politician’s home, the man calls on his wife to take the girls in, I insisted that they sit with us, as it is their future as well and they need to be participants.  The men had their heads screwed backwards, generally they discount and ignore the opinions of females but they were surprised to hear girl’s opinions, I did not let them discount the girls and asked them to listen to the two girls. We’ve to take a stand at first, and then it should become natural.

Prophet Muhammad had a vision of a civilized society; he said he would like to see a day when a single woman can go from the City of Medina to Damascus and be back harmless, fearless and peaceful. I am sure, all the great religious masters have said that, in one form or the other.  I wish we look forward to such a society.

At Center for pluralism we are committed to build cohesive societies where no American has to live in tension, apprehension or fear of the other. We have systems in place to achieve such results over a period of time.

(The author is the President and Executive Director of Center for Pluralism.  His twitter handle is #MikeGhouse and facebook is #MikeGhouse)