Love is blind, they say. And, sometimes, quite literally! How many of us are guilty of forgiving our partners once too often for their hurtful actions? When it comes to a cheating spouse, however, you would think there was no scope for forgiveness. Surprisingly, today, not many think cheating is the ultimate sin in a relationship. If you are one of those who doesn’t mind giving your partner a second chance, here are ways you can deal with his or her cheating ways…
Count yourself out
This is less about you and more about your partner. So, quit blaming yourself. Realise that it is a flaw in your significant other that got them to stray from the relationship, so spare yourself thoughts like, ‘I am not good enough’ or ‘I should have been better.’ Remember this, if you weren’t good enough, they should have dumped you instead of keeping you as a backup while enjoying with someone else.
Confront the person
Yes, we know this sounds more difficult than it seems, but it is important no matter how hard it may be. You cannot let this go without hearing the words, ‘Yes I cheated.’ Address the person with your doubts (or proof) and let them know that you are aware of their ‘fun’ time. Make sure you have a face to face conversation about the same.
Get a confession
While confrontation may lead to this step, you’ve got to be assertive that you ask them clearly whatever is on your mind, so you know the real deal. For instance, if you have a partner who is cheating on you by being just physical with someone, ask them why they did the same. Nonetheless, if your partner were both emotionally and physically available to someone else, that could be a red alert that your relationship has slipped out of your hand for good, and restoring it could take more effort and time.
Check if they are repentant
Going off on a guilt trip post cheating is normal… people do that all the time. But how genuinely sorry is your partner, that is for you to decipher. Is your partner taking it easy, behaving like ‘well, cheating is just another thing in a relationship!’ If so, he or she is a serial cheater who just doesn’t feel sorry about doing you wrong. But if you’re with someone who admits they’re sorry, and makes efforts to mend their life and your relationship, maybe another chance (depending on how many you’ve already given them) would not be a bad thing.
Can you forgive
After hearing your partner out, ask yourself this question… Can you forgive them for what they did wrong? While we know this whole space resembles a religious doctrine, we must admit that forgiving your partner is step one of moving on to a healthier space in your relationship. Unless you do the same, there is just no sense in being together.